It’s almost been a month since my last blog post. What have I been doing lately? I’ve been trying to test new gigs in town, but they obviously haven’t been working out. I would drive 4-5 hours a day and take pictures of foreclosure houses. It became pretty exhausting with that amount of driving. I calculated my hours and rate, and the total so far has been $13 an hour. However, this gig didn’t include gas. I had to calculate my own mileage and make sure that it will be covered in my taxes. I’ve driven over 1,000 miles in two weeks. My car is screaming for an oil change.
I’ve been teaching myself Korean. I finally am acquainted with the alphabet. The language is more systematic so it’s easier to learn than Chinese and Japanese. The characters are phonetic, so it’s easier to read and memorize whereas Chinese characters would have to be memorized alone.
The resource that I’ve been using is a website: howtostudykorean.com. It’s one of the most thorough Korean language website that I’ve come across. It allows me to take my time and learn it thoroughly. The lessons are taught as if the teacher is speaking to you in writing.
Other than Korean, I’ve been learning how to code. However, I’ve been using four different websites to learn coding: Codecademy, freecodecamp, Apple Developer, and Android Developer. I’ve been teaching myself as if I’m in a college course. Each lesson is reviewed for 45 minutes. I practice for an hour to an hour half. I try not to overdo it because my eyes can’t handle the screen as long anymore.
In terms of self-developing, I’ve been doing pretty decent.
In terms of well-being, mental state, I recognize that I have high level of anxiety. It could that I don’t really have a stable job that doesn’t involved with too much bullshit. It could be that I’m back home at my parent’s house with no stable job. It could be that I’m hitting the age of 25 years old and not doing anything remarkable at this point. It could be the pressure of environment where everyone has reached his/her peak.
When I didn’t recognize this, I would freak out in my head. I would trap myself in my head. I would try to sleep it off if I knew I had the time. I would shut off anything that would cause me to wire up.
In the past three months, I had three panic attacks. One of them happened when I was driving. I literally had to drive to the nearest parking lot and let myself freak out because I was literally dying inside.
In terms of all recent obstacles or issues I’ve been facing, I realized that I can’t be silent about it. The more silent I am about it, the worse my panic attacks are.
Anyways, I’m done with updating. I’m working on improving and being better and great.
Until next time,